24 Hours to Live: Cory Borisko

24 Hours to Live: Cory Borisko

Zaineb A., Editor

Everything has an end: books, movies, TV shows. The biggest end will be the expiration of our very lives. But do these things really end? They still exist in our memories, our thoughts — they don’t really end. Many believe in an afterlife that approaches at the end of our lives. What if you knew exactly when this “deadline” would occur? What if you had a 24 hour heads up…24 hours to live? What would you do in that time? Where would you spend that time? With whom would you spend it? How would you prepare, and what would be your final thoughts? I asked the head of the English department, Cory M. Borisko, these very questions.


Zaineb A.: How would you like to go?

Cory Borisko: Riding a tiger into an active volcano while screaming the lyrics to a Rage Against the Machine song.


Q: What would you want to take with you?

A: Picture of my family and a Spanish gold doubloon. Perhaps some crisps–I may get hungry.  


Q: What would you leave and for whom?

A: My beautiful wife and lovely children will be burdened with all of my belongings. I will leave them with hundreds of letters, so they won’t miss me.     


Q: What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done, and was it worth it?

A: I once tried to drink 2 liters of chocolate milk in one minute. I failed in the most spectacular way you can imagine. It was worth it. My boss didn’t think so.   


Q: Who will you miss the most from ISG?

A: My wonderful wife, Natalie Bahen.


Q: Who do you think will take your position as the head of the English department?

A: Mr. Netzler. In fact, is anybody investigating the way I died? Just saying–seems a bit suspicious.


Q: Anything to get off your chest before you go?

A: The monkey I have been forced to carry around. I don’t like the way he looks at me.


Q: What do you think about the Afterlife, and what awaits you there?

A: Rainbows and sunshine.


Q: Something to cross off your bucket list before you go?

A: I would like to see whales in their natural habitat or see a baseball game in every major league stadium in the world.


Q: Where would you go for your final day?

A: Home, to be with my family.


Q: Do you have any regrets?

A: Many. I regret every moment away from my children. I regret not becoming a famous postmodern magician. I regret not learning how to dance. I regret not mastering the ways of The Force.   


Q: Last words?

A: These pretzels are making me thirsty.